More interested in spending my Friday night walking around a big bowl of human shit than going out to get pissed or hitting the beach as most people tend to on a boiling hot weekend, I hooked up with Murdoch, Krytie TV and Shane for some super sized sewer splorin’.
All was quiet as we arrived at the first part of entry, save for Matty exclaiming “Ohh, that’s tangy!” as the scent we were about to get very familiar with entered his nostrils. Each of our eager gazes followed a cobweb covered ladder down into a pitch black room. Before climbing down we had a look around to ensure we were alone, then flicked our torches on and one by one headed under.
Down in the little room at the base of that ladder, resting calmly near the door that would take us to our destination, was one of the biggest spiders I think I’ve ever seen up close. It’s leg span wasn’t enormous, only a bit bigger than that of a decent sized huntsman. It’s abdomen on the other hand, was as big as a fricken grape. Murdoch and I aren’t exactly big fans of spiders, especially huge ones. With our breath held and butt holes clenched, he and I slowly crept around the web to the double doors without disturbing the beast.
As we pushed the doors open they shook hard, creating a huge, booming sound that bounced like squash balls off the walls of the space we were about to enter. I can barely express how refreshing this sound was, as it meant that I was finally just a few steps and one more ladder away from being in a space that I had been dying to photograph for over two years: Deathstar.
By looking at the photos taken by myself and anyone else who has shot down there it’s pretty obvious that the place is big. Even with photos such as those taken by Metawaffle, which have a person in there for scale, you’ll still not realise how big it is until you’re right in there, staring up at the ceiling.
After a solid 4 hours of taking photos, talking shit (all puns intended), walking around on dry and crunchy poos, inhaling poo dust, choking on flying poo bugs, and me finding a fresh and slippery patch of poo that I skidded a foot or two across, somehow without falling on my arse (thank fuck!) we packed our things and returned to the fresh aired world above.
For most of the time we were down here, as I cruised around playing with lights and my camera, there was one thing that kept popping up in my head, which is a particular lyric from Star Wars Rap. Have a look at the vid below, it shouldn't be hard to tell which one.